It took me all of one week to pen this title. I would have used Prof Peller ( our own homegrown magician). But, I reasoned: This Post is for an international audience. So, Houdini won.
Nigeria has this loveable knack for breeding Magicians : The more you see, the Less you understand. Quaint. Loveable but deadly like the rose flower.
And so, the Story continues.
Last week, the Nigerian Media circuits were alive with Two stories: Our First Lady, Mrs Aisha Buhari, was flown abroad on “emergency medical evacuation”. As we tried to hold ourselves together, in fear, we were told, she was evacuated in a private jet – NOT an Air Ambulance! But, that’s not all, a few days later, she was back in the country, hale and hearty, railing about the need for better medical services, in Nigeria. I almost lost it: Why is this Lady complaining openly about our medical services? I thought her Husband is the President of Nigeria. I’m lost!
And then a few days later, the revered Mallam Mamman Daura, was also flown out,on emergency medical evacuation,also. Then, a day later, the President,was shown, speaking to the emergency evacuee, on phone. Hmm. Now, here’s the clanker. The Punch newspapers reported on the 30 August,2020, that both Mrs Buhari and Mallam, were now fully recovered. Madam is back.
…and Houdini’s Heirs sprout all over!
But, the niggling worry, for me, is: Why would someone leave a Throne Room – really, Mansions in the Sky – sequestered, fruit laden tables, worshipped; and head into quarantine, of one room? Doesn’t make sense to me; but, then, Houdini never made sense. See how he ended?
I have decided to change my subtitles from “postscript” to “Magana Jari ce” and for the lighter comments, to “gidan kashe ahu”. See ! I can also do a few sleight of the hand,too.
Magana Jari Ce
Why are conflicting reports coming in about the stimulus the Federal Government promised manufacturers and medium and small businesses, since April,2020, to help cushion the ravages of the Covid 19? The Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN) has said repeatedly that it has released millions, to the manufacturing sector, yet, on 10 August, 2020, the Daily Times screamer, was that manufacturers are yet to access CBN’s #1trillion Intervention Loan. So, almost FIVE months of Covid 19, who is telling the truth? Wai! Wai! Magana Jari Ce!
Gidan kashe ahu
When a university graduate or the HND holder becomes a” hewer of wood and fetcher of water”,by Mr Keyamo’s expansive, paternal requirement ( of public services) for the 774000 jobs@ #20k ( #60k or #20k?) By the way, three months have elapsed since the President gave the order; And when elite women, patronised by the Women Affairs Ministry, receive “palliatives” of wrappers and rice from the Humanitarian Affairs Ministry.These “women” representing all our women, whom the great Sadiya Umar Farouq,the Hon Minister, described as”women are also vulnerable”; and the same Humanitarian Affairs Ministry, has unearthed 6000 “Displaced persons” in the Federal Capital Territory (FCT), then , we must shake. How did 6000 people – displaced, homeless and penniless- travel from Bornu to Abuja?
… and Houdini’s Heirs sprout…
Magana Jari Ce 2
Governor Nasir el Rufa’i may not be sitting still. In fact, he is busy. Otherwise, how did the Nigerian Army and the Nigerian Airforce deploy Special Forces and units to Southern Kaduna? No. He is doing a lot to bring peace to Southern Kaduna; but, the physical is not enough…in a time of pain. In a time of loss. the relief materials are physical palliatives. The human soul needs that ethereal union with other souls- to show he’s not alone. So far, in the handling of the Southern Kaduna crises( springing up in different places), Mr El Rufa’i has displayed an almost inhuman aloofness and abstraction. Sir, you CANNOT be consoling me and be carrying a cudgel. The recent peace between the Fulani and the Ham people, of Jaba Local Government, is an indicator that the “ordinary” people want to live in peace. True, we point at strangers,but, they live among us, unhurt. Those stoking the fire of “go back to your land” are being mischievous, spiteful and dangerous; especially those laden with looted money and have throughout their careers, pretended to be Hausa/Fulani,developing accents befitting a Kanawa; then losing their lofty perches, become tribal plus Christian champions! Woe and perdition on you!
Gidan kashe ahu 2
And the posturing by the Southwest Governors, pretending to be states in America,continues…they want to”reopen”. They want life to return to ” normal.” Ah! Gone. Those days are gone. If any Governor harbours aspirations of becoming President of Nigeria,in 2023, he should first govern his State well: This advice is to Mr El Rufa’i and Mr Fayemi.
Magana Jari Ce 3
Two totally unrelated events are happening in Benue State, simultaneously: Governor Samuel Ortom, a usually placid man, suddenly found voice in recent weeks – he wants the Federal Government to permit “well-meaning Nigerians” to own and protect themselves with the AK-47 AUTOMATIC Assault rifle. Without any condescension,has Mr Ortom ever fired a rifle? Ok. I guess by “well-meaning”, he meant those who can afford one. Currently, at black market price, it costs between #600k – #700k,I hear.Plus or minus,a few notes! Then, as we were struggling with the implications of his suggestion, he upped and threatened to “deal” with anybody who brings Myeti Allah’s “Vigilante” into Benue. Mr Ortom has brought in the well armed Livestock Guards, the Community policing, the Benue State Vigilante Group (BSVG)- distinct from the Federal Government operated Vigilante Group of Nigeria (VGN); and now, he’s calling for every “well-meaning” citizen, to strot around,logging an AK-47.
Then, the 2nd event that will and MUST happen: The agitation for a Benue South Governor,in 2023. For 44 years, the Tiv have produced ALL the Governors. In fact,each of the three main Tiv groupings has produced a Governor. And the Tivs are supposed to share Benue State with the Idomas. Wai! Wai!
Thanks for reading…